Monday, August 24, 2009
I have been thinking of a lot of things lately. My life, my love, my family, my financial, myself…..Too many things till it forms a mountain already I think ^^
Things are not in the proper way they are supposed to be….anyway I dunno actually how proper is proper since me myself even dunno what I really want for next…..
Looking forward for this coming weekend, being baptized, will have new additional name, Phoebe ;D so happy and cant wait to the day to come….looking back, 2009 is a GREATEST BEST year I had! My FYP was A, I was graduated successfully from NTU, took SOT and endure it well till the end and I have had just graduated from SOT and now I am waiting for my water baptism!!~~ God, You are simply AMAZING!! I should live my life to the fullest. Remembering each day God gives to me is a privilege for me to really live on it. Just like D’ Masiv’s song yg Jangan Menyerah~~ it’s true that everyday is a gift we must keep on persist on Hidup adalah Anugerah~~ what a super nice song that inspired me so much…
2009 is the BEST!!
Away from that, I am lost in the so many roads out there to be chosen. Being me, I should have been able to choose what is the best for me and what is the one that I like most. But,………………………………….. I dun have any choices.. I only have 1 choice which I should take in order for me to continue my life, at least better than if I wont take it. I should just take it and give my best into it… right? I should do that rite? But…… I simply cant set my heart right…. I keep on telling myself that I will be OK and there’s no harm to try it, you can even more than succeed Elis! I keep on telling myself you can get blessed and earn a lot, can pay ur debt, give some to mom and dad, and even I can give to orphan too just as what I always dream about…….. But……. I simply cant set my mood right….. I am troubled and I am not OK…. I cant find any fulfillment from it…….. I just dunno why………… I keep deceiving myself and din listen to my own heart (as I actually also not so sure what I want to be)….God…………. I really want to just run away from all this……………………
pusing….and I dun have anybody to talk……..my besties all so busy with their own lives…their school has alr started and I know how busy they are……………I simply dun have someone to talk to…………seems that even though I talk it to others, nothing much will be happened too…Sianz…. I hate transition period…….AaRrgHhhh!!!!!! wanna just shout it out loud!
I need to sit back and think what I actually want for my life….. I did it many times….. still, I cant find any answer about it yet…………. My heart so pain………….. Deep inside my heart, I always fulfilled when my art is great, when I can get someone praise me about my art……..not really art though, just that I like how it is combined and create something nice! Yet, I dun have any confidence in it….. I was wondering why others can excel so much yet I am just Elis……. why ya……… I still haven’t found my calling yet……. somebody just told me that “in the mundane then we can find our calling”……true true…..
FAITH is all about taking RISK! Jiayou Elis!! must be able to see the 4th dimension realm!! see beyond the natural!!
All things work TOGETHER for GOOD for those who loves God~~
This passage of Bible keeps on reminding me of all God’s good work in my life… Even sometimes when I feel like blaming myself, but God is actually using my mistakes and work it out to be so good! God is always Good! ALL the time!!
YESS!! ALL thing works together for GOOD!! I will always BELIEVE and TRUST God for His promises are always TRUE~~ I believe though my situation currently was in a mess….I dun really know what will happen and I am worried if I take wrong decision…BUT, God will always be with me… He will make a way though there’s no way and I believe God is making everything to work together for good for my growth….and when later when I look back I can praise and thank Him for all that He has done in my life.!
GoGoGO Elis!!! You are more than CONQUEROR!! You are the HEAD and not the tail!! ABOVE and not beneath! Yes you are just simply Elis right now but you will be succeed FOR SURE and help others and don’t ever despise the day of the small beginning!! For God always use your every moment of ur life ! He wastes none of ur experience!! I will TRUST the LORD for the path of righteous man is ordered by Him alone!!
Arise Elis!!! Always give ur BEST in doing things!! and Let HIM do the REST for you~~ Amen!!
God is with me who shall against me! Because of You.. There’s no need to fear!!! HOPE steadfast ever SURE!!
Love Ya God with all my heart and power~~ I may easily get my heart failed, but I will be faithful with all my best~ Thanks God for always being faithful to me though I am faithless to You…. You are my LORD who REIGNS in my life! Always!