Thursday, January 21, 2010


Think it's time to MOVE ON! When I said it as moving on means it's time to QUIT!!! Sigh! I need sunshine in my life...
Post heartache..I don't feel like standing up again straightly..haiz just gotten a rejection sigh! Sigh! I still can't pick up I badly hurt? Until I don't feel like talking to her...
Haiz..haiz... Do u knoe..when a thing is already broken into pieces, it will impossibly back to its original condition..even glue can't help it..what to do?
Not that I don't want to restore the relationship, it's just very hard for me to drag myself into it again...there was too much heartache....haiz...

Tonite looking for job! Must start tonite!! Renew the resume!! Start sending out resume!!
Gogogo elis! Time to move on!!

Monday, January 18, 2010

my deepest feeling....i dont like u....

if you want why rite at the start u offered it to me....if you want why dont u just take it and never let me even have a thought of it....i simply hate it....i know you have more charms than me, you are prettier than have a lot lot of secret admirer whereas i dont have any at all...i know it....enough playing with's no longer fun....u win! i admit...i cant beat u...i know....

haiz....haiz....yea yea u are the one always get's ok but cant u just dont check me out? i will give it to u...pls pls take them away...i'm ok!! argh seems everything is taken away by her if she's with me!! haiz!!!!!! dont like it!!! go away!

Sunday, January 17, 2010

Late heart troubling me so much..
I was so hurt before.. And seems that when I get hurt, it's hard for me to forget it..I can forgive and let things fade away but I still have scar left behind..scar that makes me so afraid that same things will happen again...
It's not that I don't want to have bf..just that I don't want to fight with my friend bcoz of guys..
but if so far till now I'm still silent, it doesn't mean that I'm ok with it!
I'm hurt..even till now..and I don't want it to be repeated again and again..
it's not that I don't want him or other guys..just that I'm so afraid I'll get hurt again if they choose her than me...
it's so painful..but till when I'll keep silent myself and pretend that I'm ok..
until when I can act like nothing happen if the fact is my heart hurts me so much?
Girl, u are so fake..just said it out all ur heartache..but she's just so thick skin that she don't care anything with my feeling..
Maybe bcoz my acting is acted so well till she thinks that I'm ok? Hey girl wake up!! I'm also human I still have heart!!

Amazed with myself.. I can just hide all my feeling behind..all problems in my family etc I also never share it to other..
Man..I'm so strong..but hey don't u knoe...I'm fragile inside! my heart hurts easily..and it's hard to be recovered as the scars are hardly removed..

God..what should I do? I'm so hurt..I can't simply erase everything..
Again I think I'm gonna just let go him and find other guy that she don't know..
Ok it's are gonna be good and alrite!!

I lift up all my feeling to u God..let me handle myself well..and I believe You'll help me bring peace and joy for my fam..

Good nite God...have a sweet dream to myself..